Nash: A Rough Romance Read online

  I watched as he rubbed his jaw, pointing toward the glove compartment. “Open it up for me.”

  Eyeing him for a few seconds, I did what he asked, finding a small black velvet box inside. The second I pulled it into my hands, I could swear I felt it burn. “This isn’t what I think it is.”

  “Open it. Let me know what you think.”

  Maybe I hesitated because it would remind me what a freaking fuckup I was, not worthy of finding anyone special. When I did, I couldn’t help but whistle. “You do have good taste, my friend. Big rock.”

  “Caroline deserves it. She’s been the only one to tame the demons.”

  Demons. I wasn’t certain if that would ever happen. “Then she’s one amazing lady.”

  “Yeah. I need to call her and let her know what’s going on.”

  “She keeps you on a tight leash.”

  Scorpion snorted. “Actually, it’s the other way around, my friend. She obeys me.”

  “Said like the big he-man. Funny how you need to call her.”

  He lifted his middle finger, growling as if the sound would faze me. At least he’d found someone who could ease the pain.

  “Mitch seems nice,” he said, his tone reserved.

  “Nice. That means she’s not the one for me. The truth is, she’s one woman who refuses to take shit, even after all she’s been through. She’s tough, argumentative, nasty as well as rude, and refuses to follow orders, but damn if she isn’t one gorgeous lady.”

  “Yup.”

  “What the fuck does that mean?”

  “That means you’re in love.”

  “Bullshit! That’s never going to happen to me. Fucking never.”

  Scorpion slowly turned his head, the big grin on his face one I wanted to wipe off. “Never say never, dude. It’ll cost ya.”

  He shook his head as he made a turn onto a gravel road, the ornate sign indicating Big Meadow Ranch.

  I don’t know why I bristled, but the thought of seeing Hawk again gave me mixed feelings. I’d had words with both Scorpion as well as Hawk before I’d left basecamp for anywhere other than Afghanistan or the United States. That had been just a day before Hawk had left for Montana after receiving news of the death of his brother. In truth, I was shocked that he’d agreed to take over the ranch. He’d never given a shit about it, at least after the day the six of us had left for boot camp.

  “Tell me about Raunchy Ride,” I said, trying to avoid the memories from overtaking my already fried brain.

  “It was a fucking shithole when I walked in. There was even a damn cage in front of the band, if you can believe that. Rough crowd. Spent a bunch of bucks renovating. Got rid of the asshole regulars and hired decent bands. It’s slowly turning around. Like I said. It’s now a destination.”

  “A destination, huh? Well, maybe I’ll need to check it out,” I said, barely able to hear my voice.

  “Yeah, you will.”

  The freshly fallen snow did little to hide the magnificence of the ranch, although it was much larger than I remembered. “Everything seems different.”

  “Hawk’s been working on the place nonstop. He’s got some damn good help though, including Mustang.”

  I tensed again. “So we’re all back together.” The last conversation I’d had with Mustang had been one of the reasons I’d left without telling the others where I was going, not that I’d had a single clue. I doubted the man had any desire to see me again.

  “With the exception of Vader. No one has heard from him.”

  “Yeah, well, he’s got his reasons.”

  “Do you know something I don’t know?” Scorpion asked, shooting me an odd look.

  “Nope. But don’t we all?”

  He hesitated, his eyes glassing over. “Yeah. You’re right. I’m going to give you a piece of advice. Let the shit go. No matter what you have to do, find a way. If Mitch or whatever her name is can help you do that, then keep her in your life. If she’s nothing but a way to avoid releasing your anger, then let her go.”

  “I keep telling you that she doesn’t mean anything to me.”

  “Yeah, so I’ll give you another piece of advice,” he said as he pulled up in front of the main house, a place that gave me bittersweet memories. “You keep trying to tell yourself that then maybe one day you’ll believe it. But that won’t be until you’re all alone, wondering what the fuck happened to your life.” He shifted the gear to park, cutting off the engine immediately then turning to glare at me. “I could have ended up that way and I have no doubt that’s where you’re headed.”

  I waited as he yanked off his seatbelt, climbing out and slamming the door. All I could do for a few seconds was stare at the house. The difference wasn’t striking, although there was a swing hanging from the ceiling of the front porch, the recently painted front door covered in a beautiful wreath.

  The house had been given a woman’s touch.

  Maybe both Hawk and Scorpion deserved the happiness they’d found.

  That wasn’t something I deserved.

  As I climbed out of the truck, I took a whiff of the cold air, allowing it to fill my lungs. There was nothing like clean Montana air.

  By the time I made it onto the porch, the door remained open. I shifted closer, peering inside.

  “You coming the fuck in or do I need to extend a personal invitation?”

  Hawk’s voice was gruff, although I’d recognize his teasing tone anywhere. I couldn’t help but grin as I walked inside, immediately impressed by what he’d done with the place. Hawk stood with his hands in his pockets, his green eyes managing to shimmer in the limited lighting. I might be a badass soldier, but I could smell happiness from a few hundred yards away.

  And Hawk was living large.

  For the first time since I’d returned, a pang of envy embroiled my system.

  “You look good for a world traveler,” he said as he approached, yanking me in for a bear hug.

  I was able to glare at Scorpion.

  “So I told him what the hell you’d been doing, including your stint as a mountain man,” Scorpion said as he laughed.

  I heard the sound of boots thumping against the polished wooden floor. When Mustang entered the room, I pushed away from Hawk. We stared at each other for a full minute. Then I stuck out my hand.

  Mustang took a deep breath as he approached.

  Then he did exactly what my instinct had told me he’d do if we ever saw each other again.

  He threw a hard right hook at my jaw.

  Chapter 12

  Reaper

  “You’re not going to talk to me that way, Reaper. I don’t give a fucking shit what you think happened. I know what I did was the right thing to do.”

  “Oh, yeah? Then why is Snake dead? We could have saved him if you would have listened to me.”

  “Jesus Christ. You think you’re some big killing machine? Then why the hell did you hesitate to pull the trigger, slaughtering that bastard before he bombed the prison? Huh? You want to explain that to me?” Mustang snapped as he got in my face. “I think you need to look into the mirror, buddy. You’re the reason Snake is dead. You!”

  He’d been the only man to watch as I froze for an entire ten seconds, long enough for the insurgent piece of shit to toss a grenade into the building holding Snake. As he sneered at me, a moment of rage took over, spots floating in front of my eyes.

  Without thinking, I took a swing, catching him square just below the eye.

  “You motherfucker chicken shit!”

  “What the fuck did you do that for?” Scorpion barked as he pulled me off the floor, snarling at Mustang.

  I rubbed my jaw as I stared at Mustang. The anger and venom in his eyes were quickly replaced with little more than disdain that I’d showed up after several months.

  “He knows exactly why,” Mustang said, a hint of remorse in his voice.

  “Yeah? Well, that shit isn’t going to happen in my house,” Hawk snarled as he moved in front of Mustang.

&nb
sp; “I deserved it,” I said quietly.

  Both Hawk and Scorpion glanced back and forth between us, both men hissing under their breaths.

  “We’re going to get something straight right now. What happened on that mission is done. Do you hear me? Done. Period. Get your heads out of your asses or I just might chop them off.” Hawk glared at both of us again before storming out of the room.

  “Why the hell is he pissed off?” I asked, still rubbing my jaw.

  “Maybe because he’s got a fiancée and a little girl to take care of now as well as a sprawling ranch.” Mustang’s words remained biting.

  “Little girl?” I was shocked. The man worked fast.

  The way Mustang and Scorpion looked at each other was maddening. Were there dirty little secrets hidden behind closed doors?

  “His brother’s kid. Ashley was left in Hawk’s care after Drake’s death. Hawk took it pretty hard. Now, he’s enjoying fatherhood.” Mustang issued the statement with reverence.

  “Yeah, he’s not the same Hawk that we knew, Reaper. As I already told you, none of us are. Now, both of you need to get your shit straight. I don’t care what beef you’ve got between you, it’s not going to happen in my house any more than it is in Hawk’s.” Scorpion smacked his hands on his hips, his glare harder than I’d ever seen.

  “Fine,” I said through clenched teeth.

  Mustang exhaled. “Yeah, I get it.”

  “Christ. Like dealing with fucking two-year-olds. Reaper needs our help right now and that’s what we’re going to do. Help him. When you’ve collected your shit, both of you, then we’re going to figure this out.” Scorpion turned on his heel and walked in the same direction as Hawk had gone.

  I glanced around the foyer, noticing the fresh flowers on the entrance table. The scent was almost too overpowering, maybe another reminder that I didn’t deserve to be standing there.

  The wafting cold in the room was almost unbearable. I wasn’t even sure what to say to Mustang any longer. We’d been close, the man like a walking, talking happy machine. That was before I’d accused him of being the reason Snake had died.

  “I’m sorry, Nash. That was some shit to toss your way, especially after I heard a little bit about what you’re dealing with.” Mustang’s words seemed heartfelt.

  “Did Scorpion manage to tell the world about the shit on the mountain?” I was still angry, bitter, but it had nothing to do with whatever Scorpion might have said.

  He frowned before walking closer. “Believe it or not, we’re still a team. That means we can depend on each other. From what Scorpion said, you looked pretty rough yesterday.” He eyed me carefully, never blinking. Then he grinned. “I dunno. I think you’d look good with a long beard.” After laughing, he fisted his hand, pressing it against my jaw. “You might need some ice.”

  “You might need a kick in the teeth.”

  “Very funny. Try it and I’ll smash your head against the floor.”

  “Yeah. Whatever you say, buddy.” While I allowed myself to laugh, I certainly didn’t feel like it. The same nagging weighed heavily on my mind. It was only a matter of time before we’d come face to face with another set of assholes.

  This time I’d be ready.

  This time there would be no hesitation.

  The fuckers would die.

  As I walked into one amazing library that also served as Hawk’s office, I honestly didn’t remember ever being in the room before. Granted, Hawk’s pops hadn’t been the type to allow any of Hawk’s bad boy buddies into certain portions of the house. We’d been rough and tumble back then, all six of us, pretending as if we could take on any jerkoff who tried to get in our way.

  The memories were both good and bad, yet I wouldn’t change a thing.

  “Here’s what little I could find after Scorpion supplied the details.” As Hawk handed out grainy but decent photocopies of the same man I’d seen on the internet, I should have been impressed with the time he’d taken to research Dante Giordani. However, he’d been exactly the same way the entire time we’d served together.

  Always organized.

  Always going beyond what was necessary.

  Never taking a backseat to anyone, including the rest of his unit.

  Maybe that’s exactly what I needed at this point to get my head out of my ass.

  “Ugly motherfucker,” Mustang quipped.

  “You should see him in color,” I said, half laughing.

  Hawk glared at me. “You may not have figured it out yet even though you were almost gunned down by four assailants, but this ugly fuck is considered one of the top ten federal criminals in the country.”

  “Too bad the authorities can’t get any charges to stick,” Scorpion commented.

  “Yeah, well, there are some rumors that he’s got certain members of law enforcement as well as the DA’s office in his pockets.” Hawk sat on the edge of his desk. “We’ll go talk to Sheriff Robertson, but it’s doubtful she can do anything about the situation other than to make a few phone calls.”

  “We need to find out about the DA. He’s the only one who knew where Mitch was headed.” I was beginning to have a bad feeling that maybe the DA wasn’t trying to get her to safety but allowing Giordani to have a safehouse of his own, a vacation of sorts with the woman he’d become obsessed with.

  “What’s his name?” Mustang asked.

  “Roger Porter.”

  “I’ll do a search on the guy. There’s a buddy that I met during my previous contract job that had plans to move back to Chicago, hopefully practicing law if he passed the bar exam. Maybe he knows the guy.” Mustang shrugged.

  “Good idea. No sense in raising too many red flags with the sheriff until we’re certain of who the hell the players are.” Hawk locked eyes with mine. “Not that I don’t trust the sheriff, I do. I just don’t trust the system in other cities.”

  “Understood. I need to make certain Mitch’s story checks out.”

  Now all three of the men stole guarded glances between themselves.

  “Look. She appeared like some whirlwind ninja during the middle of a snowstorm. I didn’t see her vehicle when we were being chased down the freaking side of the mountain. I also found it convenient that she was trying to find another cabin near mine, which I’ve never heard a thing about. While I like the girl, I ain’t gonna trust anyone at this point. Period. Okay?” I realized I’d raised my voice and huffed, looking away from their prying eyes.

  “Makes damn good sense to me,” Mustang chortled. “We should try and find that car of hers.”

  “That’s the Reaper we know and love, and we have plans on riding up the mountain tomorrow if the weather holds,” Scorpion added.

  “That might be an issue. Another storm is rolling in. You might have to stay with Scorpion a little while longer and from what he says, it’s entertaining as hell.” Mustang moved several feet away from me, holding up his hands.

  Scorpion groaned and rubbed his face. “I hate all of you and this man needs to get out of my house!” He finally laughed and while I realized he was kidding, I also knew that our sudden appearance had certainly caught him off guard. The place wasn’t really big enough for three, let alone if his gal came over.

  “I’ll find a place to stay,” I said, although I had no idea where or how.

  “With what money, dude?” Scorpion snarked.

  I tipped my head in his direction. At this point, I was finished with being the butt of jokes. “I have money in the bank.”

  “It’s about accessing it without your ID. The banks are very strict.” Mustang cocked his head and lifted his eyebrow.

  Hawk was the only one who hadn’t said anything. He re-crossed his feet, taking a deep breath before offering his sage advice, something that used to piss me off like crazy.

  “If I learned one thing since returning from hell, it’s that trusting anyone is the most difficult aspect of returning to civilian life, at least after the shit we were forced to go through. I almost lost the best
thing that’s ever happened to me because I refused to trust Bryce. Thank God she knocked some sense into me. I don’t think this life would be worth much without her and Ashley in it. Trust your gut, Nash. That’s all any of us can do. It’s never let us down before.” Hawk kept his hard glare pinned on me, his eyes flashing. I could swear the man was daring me to challenge him. “Mustang is right. You’ll never gain access to your accounts until you manage to retrieve your wallet. Bryce has a house that she’s been hesitant to rent out to anyone and isn’t ready to sell. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind you staying there. I’ll arrange it.”

  If there was one thing I hated, it was taking handouts, but at this point, I had zero choices. What bothered me was their cavalier attitudes.

  “What about guilt?” I threw out without thinking. “Doesn’t it keep you up at night? Doesn’t it make you sick at least once a day?”

  The quiet in the room was unsettling. Scorpion finally cleared his throat, answering for the other two.

  “You know how I feel about that, my friend. All it can do is eat you alive. You can’t bring Snake back. None of us can. But you can live your life as he would have intended. That’s the one thing I do know.”

  Another few seconds of tension settled between us. This was awkward as hell.

  “What about Bryce checking with her sources to see if she can find anything on this Giordani character?” Mustang asked, breaking the chilled air. “She’s a reporter here in town. A pretty good one too. Tenacious as fuck.” He laughed as Hawk gave him a lifted eyebrow. “You know what I’m saying is right.”

  “Yeah, it’s a good idea. If there’s any dirt about or around this guy to find, she’ll be the one to do it. I’ll give her a call on the way to the sheriff’s office. I am coming with the two of you. The sheriff still owes me a favor or two.”

  I found it hard to believe they’d simply shoved the experience in a neat little black box, forcing it out of sight and out of mind. That pissed me off more than anything. “Whatever. I don’t want to leave Mitch alone too long.”

  “You afraid she’d going to run out again?” Scorpion asked, unable to keep the grin off his face.